stable or no?

been thinking alot lately, especially when i get to be alone by myself. really, you can all it paranoia whatsoever, but somehow i feel like i don't really have a definite & possibly stable future (???) okay, shut up brain. am probably thinking waay too much into things. seeing all my friends in top colleges and everything, i know that i could've done better ( AND made better and more sensible decisions). things got complicated in the middle, and now im a place where no one would really wanna go to if they had a choice. shut up brain, things only seem to be revolving around this dark cloud of nonsense. I guess everything happens for a reason, and that God wants me to go through this and learn. I just hope He knows what He's doing.